( though she holds his gaze, forces herself to, she doesn't answer him. the only answer that rowena has isn't a hopeful one. so she steps forward again, keeping walking until she's also in his space beside lucifer, reaching out to rest a hand on his arm )
You told me that it doesn't go away.
( she does look sympathetic when she tells him, hating that she has to tell him something so hopeless )
But perhaps we can find something. A spell, something to help guard your mind?
( she squeezes lightly at his arm, using the contact to draw him back towards the table. this will become her new research project, trying to find some way to help him )
I still have a story to tell you and I can look at brewing you something.
( or magically putting him to sleep but that certainly wasn't a permanent solution )
[The touch at his arm is enough to dispel the image of Lucifer for now and Sam looks wildly around for a moment or two before he tries to calm himself.]
( her smile's gentle, keeping hold of his arm for a few moments as a little extra reassurance before letting him go. she tops his scotch up a little before sitting back down )
Our first meeting was a chance encounter: you were looking for a demon I'd just killed. I never did ask why but I assume something for one of your cases.
( she didn't ask why because dean had very quickly pulled a gun on her and in retaliation she'd spelled a girl that ended up killing her. not anyone's finest moment )
But a little while later it was actually you who sought me out for help on something, an ancient spell that you needed breaking and... something kept secret from Dean. Then at least.
We were nothing close to friends then but you sought me out anyway, hoping that I'd be able to help you.
( that she had isn't the important part, nor the fact that she'd been able to pull it off which is why rowena doesn't mention it )
You took a chance, why I still haven't figured out but... I'm glad you did.
( which is why she'd forgiven his little insurance at the time. and how drastically they'd ended up changing her life but it had mostly been for the better )
Yeah, that tracks, honestly. [Of the two brothers, Sam has been the one to seek out alternatives more often than not. He takes a good swig of the scotch as he continues to calm his nerves.]
( the slowness of her words leaks her discomfort at the topic even if she's agreeing to talk about it. but she needs a moment to steel herself first, her gaze dropping a little from him )
Lucifer has killed me. Twice.
( she draws her glass closer to her now, lifting her head slowly )
The second time... he was making a point. Before he ( crushed my skull. she leaves out the detail this time ) killed me he showed me his face. His true face.
( though rowena smiles there's nothing happy about it, there for a moment before she drinks )
( don't mind her extended pause as she finishes her scotch off. lucifer always brings that out )
Well, one day I'll see him dead. Maybe then it'll ease that little memory.
( and that would have been sooner if she hadn't fucked up their little plan. the boys would have killed him after returning with their mum. the best hope she has now is that he stays trapped in that other world. or they kill him there )
( given everything that she's already told him and what just happened with lucifer she feels like it'd be a little much to tell him what they were currently doing. it was also a much bigger story than just lucifer, especially bringing his mum into it )
But he's not invulnerable. One day it'll happen.
( she just hated that she couldn't use her little spell to cage him whilst he was wearing nick. that'd solve so many problems )
Do you think he'd be more vulnerable if he was... [Inside him, Sam doesn't finish. He'd slowed Lucifer before and now he was facing the consequences, but if it meant Lucifer didn't walk free any more, Sam would do what it takes.]
( except rowena knows that he would, that if there was no way to stop him that she couldn't ask samuel not to do it just so selfishly she didn't lose a friend. she also wouldn't really stop him, even if she wanted to think of another way.
but it's also not a conversation she wants to have, not ever, especially when lucifer isn't here )
And here... there may be no solution. My magic failed in attempting to travel through time, even if I had the ingredients to open a portal I doubt that would work. Dragging him to Hell may not be an option.
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You told me that it doesn't go away.
( she does look sympathetic when she tells him, hating that she has to tell him something so hopeless )
But perhaps we can find something. A spell, something to help guard your mind?
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Sam swallows and shudders slightly. Is he stuck with Lucifer following him around, then? What does he tell Dean?]
Will that work?
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( it's something for rowena to believe in. even if samuel was still seeing lucifer like this rather than just being haunted. he'd done something )
We can find something, Samuel. I believe that.
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[In this moment. As Lucifer reaches out to pat Sam's face.
You just gotta get used to reality, Sammy. I'm real, I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere.
Sam winces and one again puts one foot in front of the other to lead himself away from Lucifer.]
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( she squeezes lightly at his arm, using the contact to draw him back towards the table. this will become her new research project, trying to find some way to help him )
I still have a story to tell you and I can look at brewing you something.
( or magically putting him to sleep but that certainly wasn't a permanent solution )
If you still wanted to hear it?
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He's gone. [For now.]
Uh, yeah. Story sounds great.
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Our first meeting was a chance encounter: you were looking for a demon I'd just killed. I never did ask why but I assume something for one of your cases.
( she didn't ask why because dean had very quickly pulled a gun on her and in retaliation she'd spelled a girl that ended up killing her. not anyone's finest moment )
But a little while later it was actually you who sought me out for help on something, an ancient spell that you needed breaking and... something kept secret from Dean. Then at least.
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Yeah, probably. [Sam doesn't realize he's sweating until he wipes his face.]
Sounds familiar. [Keeping secrets from Dean seems to be a trend.]
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( that she had isn't the important part, nor the fact that she'd been able to pull it off which is why rowena doesn't mention it )
You took a chance, why I still haven't figured out but... I'm glad you did.
( which is why she'd forgiven his little insurance at the time. and how drastically they'd ended up changing her life but it had mostly been for the better )
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Can I ask why you see him, uh, Lucifer?
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( the slowness of her words leaks her discomfort at the topic even if she's agreeing to talk about it. but she needs a moment to steel herself first, her gaze dropping a little from him )
Lucifer has killed me. Twice.
( she draws her glass closer to her now, lifting her head slowly )
The second time... he was making a point. Before he ( crushed my skull. she leaves out the detail this time ) killed me he showed me his face. His true face.
( though rowena smiles there's nothing happy about it, there for a moment before she drinks )
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I'm sorry that happened.
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Well, one day I'll see him dead. Maybe then it'll ease that little memory.
( and that would have been sooner if she hadn't fucked up their little plan. the boys would have killed him after returning with their mum. the best hope she has now is that he stays trapped in that other world. or they kill him there )
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Is that something you know or something you hope for?
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( given everything that she's already told him and what just happened with lucifer she feels like it'd be a little much to tell him what they were currently doing. it was also a much bigger story than just lucifer, especially bringing his mum into it )
But he's not invulnerable. One day it'll happen.
( she just hated that she couldn't use her little spell to cage him whilst he was wearing nick. that'd solve so many problems )
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( she reaches across the table to him, resting her hand on his wrist, eyes locked on his in a don't you dare )
Lucifer isn't vulnerable when he's in a vessel, any vessel makes him more difficult to touch.
( sure, a vessel that wasn't his he burned through quickly but even hopping around made him harder to touch )
In you? ( she scoffs at that idea. samuel was his destined vessel ) He'd be stronger. And you are exactly what he wants, Samuel.
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Makes sense. [Sam looks down at his cup.] But I was the only one to ever hold him long enough to dump both of us in Hell.
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( she squeezes his wrist gently, knowing the sacrifice that it took and the kind of person it took to do that, before drawing her hand back )
Since then... he's held multiple vessels, some more long-term than others. Currently, he's in a man very familiar to you.
( nick. they'd given her some details on who he was though she cared very little about that man. especially with what he'd done )
I wish I could say sending him to the Cage was an option. There's a spell but... it may not be enough.
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[During what may be a hallucination. He's not entirely sure what to call it.]
If he shows up again, if we have the horsemen's rings... I could take him back to Hell.
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( except rowena knows that he would, that if there was no way to stop him that she couldn't ask samuel not to do it just so selfishly she didn't lose a friend. she also wouldn't really stop him, even if she wanted to think of another way.
but it's also not a conversation she wants to have, not ever, especially when lucifer isn't here )
And here... there may be no solution. My magic failed in attempting to travel through time, even if I had the ingredients to open a portal I doubt that would work. Dragging him to Hell may not be an option.
( was this place even connected to a hell? )
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What should I do if I see him again?
[Because he doesn't doubt that Lucifer will be back to haunt him.]
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( her finger gestures to her head rather than to his )
You could call someone, have them distract you from what you're seeing?
( she doesn't know if what she does would be the most helpful to him )
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( she had to believe that based on what she knew of his future )
If we can link the sigil to what you see... perhaps it'll help.
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